When I was young I was rotten on the inside. Nasty, disgusting, hateful and more.
Why? Partly because of poor parenting; especially so in the case of my father.
I had severe mental health issues from which I have genuinely* (*I do not take mind altering drugs – ‘happy pills’ etc) recovered today; so much so that I even count mental health professionals and doctors among my clients!
One of the critical keys to my freedom, joy, character and peace of mind today was that I took personal responsibility for fixing the mess my parents made, and the mess I made by subsequent poor choices and thinking.
Another important key was that I faced up to the truth and ‘confronted’ my inner ‘rottenness’. One aspect of this is that if we do not acknowledge and face up to who we really are inside, then we are not going to be able to change, or even realise that we need to change. Instead we will live a life of denial and delusion, all the while ‘inflicting’ ourselves upon other people and animals.
Today I came across this impressive and clever video which demonstrates the shallow and hateful nature of large numbers of people. Watch the video and listen, as well as you can, to your subconscious mind and see if you ‘align’ with any of the horrible attitudes displayed – if any resonate with you, then you have some work to do.
Video: You Look Disgusting (Woman posted images of herself without makeup on social media. The film contains real comments that were left on images of her face).
In our society we are subjected to a multitude of things which condition our subconscious minds to think along certain lines. Beauty related advertising is one example.
Like most people, I appreciate beauty. The beauty of nature for example. We are ‘hard-wired’ to appreciate the beauty of nature. This preference for beauty is normal and part of our ‘biology’. What is bad is when we focus on what is not beautiful in an unhealthy way which can not only harm others, but which can corrode our internal character.
It is important to have balance. Yes, beauty can and should be celebrated. On the other hand, we need to exercise care that viewing a lack of beauty does not feed our inner ugliness. Our subconscious minds can and do get in the way of this balance however.
In my garden we have a bird with an abnormally twisted beak – I watch him/her eating and enjoy seeing the will to survive and the clear good health the bird enjoys; which in the case of this bird, is where the significant ‘beauty’ lies. I do not ‘see’ deformity. In any case, I was once ‘deformed’ inside, which matched my slanted (disfigured face – more visible when not smiling – see bottom of post for photograph), and that was worse than any physical deformity. Who am I to judge and denigrate deformity?
Being ‘deformed’ inside – having a rotten character – is far worse than having a slanted face like mine, a disability (my hearing loss which requires hearing aids – aka ‘deaf bastard’, ‘four ears’, ‘spastic’, to some people) and having one bollock that is smaller than the other because my parents never got an undescended testicle* and associated hernia sorted out until I was almost a teenager. (*PS: It never stopped me dating beautiful women (inside and out) and I am married to one I have known since 1999). Don’t worry, there’s no picture of the testicle – you will have to take my word for it.
It is possible to change our subconscious minds in such a way that good character can develop. Personally, I found that much of the positive character development I experienced was a ‘side-effect’ of sorting out subconscious mind issues which were causing me pain. Most of my clients seek my help in resolving issues which are painful or difficult in some way. A few directly seek help in developing character. An important point to bear in mind is that generally, fixing internal pain is more important to people than developing character. Once significant pain areas are resolved, people are then much better able to focus on character development – it’s a kind of ‘evolution’.
Another key thing I learned along the way to the deep inner freedom I know today, was the realisation that a significant part of the power that the horrid words of others have to harm us lies in what WE think about the words. Significant parts of stress for example comes from what we think about a situation. The same applies for words. No one makes you angry – you get angry because of what you think about a situation. (Subconscious Mind Change 6 – Nobody And Nothing Made You Angry).
Trolls, bullies and other haters have rotten insides. What they think and have to say does not matter; unless YOU make it matter with the power of YOUR thoughts. Such people are worthy of the label ‘shitheads’ – their minds are full of shit. Now, if you walked past an overflowing blocked toilet and it spoke to you, calling you names etc…would you pay any attention? Of course not – because your eyes would tell you it was a toilet full of crap. So it is with trolls and bullies – they are full of crap. As such, they are ‘nothings’. In fact, as one evolves character-wise it becomes easier to see these trogs more clearly – they are sad empty souls in need of help – people to be pitied. Perhaps we can help them?
Kindness wins. Kindness to yourself and to others.
Be that person. Not the toilet-head.
- If you need help to overcome your own inner rottenness please get in touch. Besides being able to help you effect remarkable change, I won’t judge you. I too was once rotten.
- If you like the corset my wife is wearing, Absolute Corsets is where she obtained it from. It is hand made. The stockings are Cervin Tentation Fully Fashioned.
- One reason I can write so openly about my defects is because my self-esteem is high. I do not rely on other people for my sense of worth.